By Jenn Lederer
For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a strong tendency to want to fix things.
ALL the things.
Things I struggle with. Things my friends struggle with. Things my clients struggle with. Things my family struggles with.
I wanted to FIX it so that we could get to the HAPPINESS already!
If I could just get this thing out of the way, the rest would be a breeze.
On the surface it sounds like a great plan.
See problem —–> FIX problem —–> NO MORE PROBLEM!
*Cue parade of happiness!*
Until I started to realize that the “problem” was actually a game of whack-a-mole and every time I thought things were “fixed” the same problem would sooner than later appear in whatever new World Of Happiness I thought I had created.
“Everywhere you go, there you are.” – Confucius
The problem with only wanting to fix the problem is you end up spending ALL of your time/energy/resources on said problem leaving nothing left for…well…anything else.
That happy moment that showed up today? You missed it.
Because you were focused on the “good, responsible work” of fixing your (money) problem, (relationship) problem, (job) problem, (perfectionist) problem, and the list goes on…
When you fix the problem the happiness will flow, so until the problem ceases to exist…nothing else truly matters.
See the problem?
That “problem” that seems to be mucking it all up…whether we like it or not…is a part of us. It’s an expression of something that EXISTS within us.
A belief system. A safety mechanism. A survival technique.
It’s there for a REASON. It cannot be destroyed or cut off or eliminated by way of execution.
When I came to the realization that it might not be the best idea (or even possible) to cut off parts of myself that are trying to help me survive to the best of their ability…
That lead me to ask the ONE question that changed everything:
Instead of “How can I fix this?”, I started wondering “How can I integrate this?”
If this problem is really just a solution in disguise, what would it take to get on the same page and begin using this resource for what it was ALWAYS meant to be:
What if your “problem” was actually the antidote to your pain?
What if you could access your POWER in a completely NEW way?
What if you could INTEGRATE this medicine into your work/life/expression in a new way?
LAUGHTER has become one of my most potent ways to INTEGRATE my “problems” into a more useful source of inspiration, momentum, alignment and integrity.
I no longer see myself as a slew of “problems” that need fixed and instead I see myself as a never-ending source of ingredients specially made for me.
Now, instead of spending my time and energy “fixing” things, I’m like a mad scientist exploring and experimenting with the correct dosage, with the right mix of ingredients, the right pressure, the right temperature that utilize my ingredients in just the right way.
(It’s like I was using salt when the recipe was calling for sugar the whole time!)
I AM NOT HERE TO BE FIXED, I AM HERE TO BE EXPRESSED, FULLY.
All parts. (even the ones my Ego has deemed problematic…ESPECIALLY those parts.)
Since shifting my focus towards INTEGRATION, I am more aligned, more in integrity and more in my HAPPY PLACE than I ever was when I was hooked on “the fix.”
NOT because I am “problem” free, but because I see said problems for the medicine they have always wanted to be in my life.
Jenn Lederer is a Motivational Speaker and Leadership Coach for Creative Entrepreneurs. With her wicked sense of humor, intuition, and no-bullshit approach to coaching and wellness, she is able to help her clients authentically see themselves and stop playing small. Jenn is an esteemed, and frequently published, member of the Forbes Coaches Council, a contributor to The Huffington Post Wellness section, and recently gave talks at Yale and Google Headquarters in New York.
VitaminR’s VisionWorking Series: Laughing Through Tears: Use Comedy To Magnetize Your Message
An Evening Workshop with Jenn Lederer
Wednesday, June 19, 2019, 6:00 – 10:00 pm
To learn more and register, click here.